Puzzled

It's complicated, It's not about what you want neither what you need, life seems to go in a direction other than what the direction you wanted; It's not that you want something and you work for it and it just happens, it is more of a consecutive failures but that does not mean that you did not take your chances or that you did not do something properly but sometimes someone's intervenes in your plans and it fails, sometimes you lose your motivation and give up.
You come to realize that life does not go on a specific plan, life is not just a timeline of events and your role is just to wait until their time is due. Life turns out to be a series of expectations and failures, a random list of goals and warning signs of the things you try to avoid.
But all the times you failed weren't coincidences, if that was true your life will be a constant downhill towards nowhere.
You have grown up, you became an adult, and all the myths you heard from your childhood about how difficult it is to be an adult turned out to be true, your shoulders are ten times heavier now because of all the responsibilities you have to carry now, And all the simple things you did not have to work for as a kid become a mission you try to accomplish; Things like finding a genuine friend or finding someone to love aren't as easy as they were when you were young; It's not that people changed as they grow up but you're no longer a part of their life plan and every person have their own goals, their own timeline and their own expectations, just like you do.
People will go in different paths, seeking the place where they accomplish their goals and live their dreams, you cannot blame people in their choices and you cannot blame yourself for making your own path and leaving people behind.
People are puzzles, and if your shape does not allow you to fit in someone else's puzzle, you will never fit; You can change yourself to fit temporarily in someone else's puzzle but eventually you will be removed for someone else who will fit your space perfectly.
Eventually, you realize you are not just a wandering piece of puzzle searching for a space to fill, you, yourself are a puzzle, a puzzle you want to fill with people of your choice who will properly fit each specific space to make the picture complete.
And that's what makes us in constant search for something or someone; Everyone is looking for something, some people are looking for a lover, other are looking for a friend and others are looking for a family. We do not always know what we are looking for but we all are searching continuously for the people who can solve our puzzles. Sometimes we find what we are looking for but their space is already occupied or there is a scar in their space that will not allow them to fit in properly and they have to leave.
Simply put, you are a piece of puzzle in someone else's puzzle searching for the proper pieces to solve your own puzzle. And that what makes us different and difficult to understand, you see, you cannot solve every puzzle.