Sunday, February 22, 2015

Angel



Sometimes I feel like words can never be enough to transfer the idea in my head to yours, And I feel like no matter how many words I say you'll never truly understand the warmth of my feelings. It's complicated yet simple, like the waves in the sea during a storm; You can see how beautiful they are from the surface but you can never know the power they conceal.
I like to think of us as two souls who met by coincidence and now, they're inseparable; Like a newborn child and his mother or more accurately like a book and its cover; We are just in constant need for each other and no matter how hard life circumstances could be or no matter what people do to tear us apart, we will always find the map to each other's heart again. It just feels right, It feels like this is the direction we both want to go and this is the only direction where we both will go.
And I don't remember the exact moment when all of this began; I remember our first meeting, our first conversation and our first date. But I can't remember when you became a piece of me, a part of my character, a partner, someone who I would always think of prior to making any decision -even if it was just choosing a shirt to wear.
Truth is, you became a part of me and I became a part of you; And the beautiful mixture of our characters together makes everything related to you something spectacular, some sort of magic that I can never explain. I have to admit the look in your eyes in the morning is the best moment of my day; The warmth of the sun rays as it enlightens your pink cheeks creates a heart-warming mosaic with your golden ponytail that I think is amazingly cute even though you don't like it.
And you just loved how I made you laugh; All the lousy jokes I said and our memories together always drew a big smile on your face; And that smile always made me feel secure, it feels like that pretty smile of yours sends a message saying 'I will never leave' and it was something that I felt, some sort of peace that conquers my heart and soul.
The funny thing is, whenever my friends or anyone ask me about you, I just can't find the words to describe you and end up saying 'She's good' -Well sorry for that. I never believed in the word 'speechless'; I never thought that the human mind can actually stop generating words at one moment, but when it comes to you it is a different scenario. Words can never be enough to describe your greatness and beauty; I can keep talking about our love for years and I will never deliver the exact feelings or sensation.
It's true what they say about life and how it's always surprising; One day you were just the cute girl in class and now you became someone who I trust more than myself, someone who would stand beside me when everyone walks away, someone who I can tell all my secrets without second-thinking, someone I love. And the definition of love was and still always difficult for me to understand; I realized that love cannot be expressed by words, love is felt; Love is that feeling of loss of control but equilibrated with the stability of your feelings; Your heart is racing at one end while your thoughts are giving you some sort of peace and control.
And I loved loving you; I enjoyed every day you laid next to me, I loved all the little things you told me and most of all I loved to cheer you up when you were having a bad day; I wanted to be there for you in sickness and in health, I wanted to live with your ups and downs, I wanted to be the one you can rely on, someone who would understand your soul and love it.
I think I reached a point where I'd go insane if I was forced to live without you; It's just something that I don't even want to imagine, I really can't think of a future that's not built on you and your love. Actually, I think I can summarize what I want in life in one line: 'I want to grow old with you'; I want to take you around the world when we are 70 years old, I want to have children with you and watch them grow to be beautiful as their mother, I want to spend every moment in my life telling you how lucky I am to have such a perfect human being by my side for all these years, I want you to set in my lap while we watch Titanic for the 100th time because you love the movie and I loved it because you do, I want to be the one who makes you happy.
My dear, I want to grow old with you.

Friday, February 20, 2015

Dreams



You could be my one and only
I promise that with me you'll never be lonely
I would hold your heart wholly
But only if you let me
I would erase away your pain
I don't mind if you wanted me to go insane
I would hold your hand every time we're on a plane
But only if you let me
And when the night becomes the day
I will be there to hear you say
That you will never run away
But only if you let me
And as we grow old together
And you realize that it did last forever
I would kiss you in every different weather
But only if you let me
And when our kids grow up and leave
When they achieve everything, they could achieve
I will make each night feel like Christmas eve
But only if you let me
And when you feel tired and fragile
And that you need to stay away for awhile
I would do my best to make you smile
But only if you let me
And when people give up on you and walk away
I would be the only one to stay
I would take you to Spain in May
But only if you let me
And if I ever changed with you
If I started saying things that I don't do
I would be happy if you gave me a hint or a clue
But only if you let me
And when God takes me away from you
Remember all the things that I kept telling you
Remember the love that I once shared with you
But only if I let you.

Thursday, February 19, 2015

The Beginning



It's terrifying how people can disappear when they find a 'better' substitute. And a moment of confusion hits you when you don't know whether you should feel guilt or loneliness. It's understandable for people to leave sometimes but I am afraid most of the times people don't make sense anymore.
I've been thinking a lot lately in an attempt to understand people and their reasons; Truth is, people never really leave unless they wanted to, they wanted to be away from you and end the relationship that is between you.
Then why would people get in a relationship they know they don't want to be in? Or is there's a major traumatic event in each one of those relationships that caused the other person to walk away?
We hear 'People have their reasons' a lot but did we ever think about those reasons, and are those reasons strong enough to tear away a relationship? I don't think so.
Then that brings us back to the first question, do people place themselves in a relationship they know it won't last? Actually, after few experiences I'd say yes.
People tend to seek attention even from strangers, People love to be referred to as someone who has a lot of friends or someone who everyone loves. Even if that ruined few relationships here and there. I know no one can keep all relationships alive at once; But if that's true, what gives certain 'strangers' priority over others? Are the relationships we have today a result of a hunch we had a long time ago when we first met them?
I guess that got you spinning in circles as well.
I see that it goes as follows: You never know who you would be friends with or who you would love and cherish and who you would hate or dislike. 

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